How Loneliness Almost Discouraged Me From Solo Traveling
January 2022 was a frigid winter in Boston. I was working hybrid, going to the office once a week, every other week. On a fully remote week, I channeled my inner snowbird and flew to Cancun, Mexico.
This was my first trip to Mexico, but it was not my first time traveling solo. From the moment I landed in Mexico, I struggled with transportation. While Uber is active in Cancun (and significantly cheaper than taxis), the taxi industry has emerged as a serious enemy of the ride-share service (FYI, this is not unique to Mexico). So much so that many Uber drivers are afraid to drive out of fear of violence from taxi drivers. Needless to say, Uber drivers were limited.
When I managed to secure a couple rides, the drivers would always request that I ride shotgun to avoid being noticed by taxi drivers. Due to the limited availability of Uber drivers (especially in heavy tourist areas), I was compelled to pay exorbitant taxi fares on several occasions at the risk of being stranded as a solo traveler. This dynamic truly dampened my experience in Cancun.
To compound the stress around transportation, I lost my debit card on the second day of my trip. These factors may have intensified the loneliness I felt during that trip.
I had booked a day-long excursion before losing my card, but this activity only contributed to my sense of loneliness. From Las Colorados to the Mayan clay bath to the alligator farm, I was hyper-aware of the families, couples, and friends bonding around me. I was self-conscious, convinced everyone around me was pitying the solo traveler. Later that night, I returned to my Airbnb feeling deflated. I promised myself I would never travel alone again.
By mid-2023, I had decided to explore life as a digital nomad. I packed all my belongings in storage and traveled to Guatemala. This was my first time traveling alone since that Mexico trip—well, not quite. By then, I had adopted my pup, Maia, and we have been joined at the hip — or rather by her K9 Sport Sack, on all of my adventures ever since. My stay in Guatemala has been a long, beautiful, chaotic, solo-ish adventure.
While I would be remiss not to credit my fur companion for some relief from loneliness, I believe a change in my overall perspective on solo traveling has helped keep that empty feeling at bay.
Here’s what I would tell my not-so-much-younger self—and anyone else who is delaying travel plans to avoid traveling solo:
Firstly, your feelings are valid. Humans are social beings. We cannot exist in silos. Even for introverts who prefer time alone, solo traveling can get lonely.
Secondly, do it anyway. Some people spend their entire lives waiting for others to live to the fullest. Don’t be one of them. The opportunity to create memories with people you know and love is priceless. But, do not deny yourself experiences and personal growth because you aren’t able to share them. Solo traveling is an excellent opportunity to get out of our comfort zones, meet new people, and build confidence.
As I get older, I am beginning to realize that my biggest regrets in life are not the things I have done but those I didn’t do.
We all have our own lives to live and our own paths to follow. Learn to appreciate your own company. You will be stronger for it.
Finally, consider the pros of traveling alone. I appreciate having total control over my itinerary, accommodation, activities, and sleep schedule. Nothing is worse than staying in underwhelming accommodations because your travel partner is the “we’re only sleeping there” type or the cold wars that inevitably ensue by day 3 of group trips.
If you’ve made it this far in the post but are still wary of solo traveling, that’s okay. There are many companies offering group trips. Hostels are also great accommodation options for travelers who prefer group settings. Just do your research and choose reputable tour groups/hostels. Safety first!
Whether you decide to travel solo or stick with groups, just don’t allow someone else’s schedule to dictate yours.
Adventure bound! Until next time, Wanderers.